1 00:00:00,957 --> 00:00:02,741 Warning. 2 00:00:02,741 --> 00:00:04,569 The following program contains really coarse language, 3 00:00:04,569 --> 00:00:08,965 weed, alcohol consumption, smoking and sexual inferences. 4 00:00:10,662 --> 00:00:13,143 This content may not be suitable for viewers under 18. 5 00:00:13,143 --> 00:00:14,753 To activate parental controls, 6 00:00:14,753 --> 00:00:17,104 please press the big, "Go yourself!" 7 00:00:17,104 --> 00:00:19,584 Button on your remote control. 8 00:00:31,205 --> 00:00:33,511 I know what the 10 deadliest animals in the world are 9 00:00:33,511 --> 00:00:34,730 or things in the world now. 10 00:00:34,730 --> 00:00:36,645 I didn't know. 11 00:00:36,645 --> 00:00:37,689 It's not what you think. You think like a bear or Shark. 12 00:00:37,689 --> 00:00:39,691 No, man. Insects. 13 00:00:39,691 --> 00:00:42,346 - Fucking mosquitoes. - Deadliest thing in the world. 14 00:00:42,346 --> 00:00:43,869 They kill the most people. 15 00:00:43,869 --> 00:00:47,482 - 725,000 people a year. That's fucking nuts. 16 00:00:48,613 --> 00:00:50,050 Well that's, you know why? 17 00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:52,878 Because they can fucking carry different, 18 00:00:52,878 --> 00:00:56,099 all kinds of different diseases in their blood and then they 19 00:00:56,099 --> 00:01:00,060 just jam their little infected stinger right into ya. 20 00:01:00,060 --> 00:01:01,235 I heard- 21 00:01:01,235 --> 00:01:02,410 - And then you've got it all, 22 00:01:02,410 --> 00:01:03,976 whatever they just drank. 23 00:01:03,976 --> 00:01:05,500 There's gotta be a way of like, 24 00:01:05,500 --> 00:01:07,067 killing all of them. 25 00:01:07,067 --> 00:01:08,416 They're like of no use to the planet, are they? 26 00:01:08,416 --> 00:01:10,200 They're just fucking you. Right? 27 00:01:10,200 --> 00:01:11,767 - They're, they're like fucking 28 00:01:11,767 --> 00:01:14,248 the metal terminators. You can't kill them. 29 00:01:14,248 --> 00:01:15,858 - Can't kill 'em? - No. 30 00:01:15,858 --> 00:01:17,729 Very difficult to wipe out mosquitoes. 31 00:01:17,729 --> 00:01:18,904 I heard some places, 32 00:01:18,904 --> 00:01:20,428 the mosquitoes so big that 33 00:01:20,428 --> 00:01:21,429 bite you and they suck all your blood 34 00:01:21,429 --> 00:01:22,256 out and you're dead. 35 00:01:22,256 --> 00:01:23,431 Ricky... 36 00:01:23,431 --> 00:01:24,606 Come on, man, that's not. 37 00:01:24,606 --> 00:01:25,737 That's a huge fucking mosquito. 38 00:01:25,737 --> 00:01:27,261 - Oh, I know. - Ricky. 39 00:01:27,261 --> 00:01:30,133 Size of like a big bird. 40 00:01:30,133 --> 00:01:31,743 - There's no mosquitoes that can suck 41 00:01:31,743 --> 00:01:34,268 all your blood out in one go. 42 00:01:34,268 --> 00:01:35,834 - When you're sleeping, 43 00:01:35,834 --> 00:01:37,662 you don't even realize cause they got this 44 00:01:37,662 --> 00:01:39,534 special sauce they inject into ya that numbs ya. 45 00:01:39,534 --> 00:01:42,450 No, but Rickey, you got six liters of blood in you. 46 00:01:42,450 --> 00:01:44,539 That means the fucking mosquito would have to have 47 00:01:44,539 --> 00:01:46,323 a six liter tank on it's stomach. 48 00:01:46,323 --> 00:01:47,890 - Three fucking bottles of pop. 49 00:01:47,890 --> 00:01:49,718 They don't take it all. 50 00:01:49,718 --> 00:01:51,415 But they take enough that you're like, you're not waking up. 51 00:01:51,415 --> 00:01:53,113 It's a piss off. 52 00:01:53,113 --> 00:01:56,420 Well, they'd have to take at least, fuck, 53 00:01:56,420 --> 00:01:59,380 four, four and a half liters for you to die. 54 00:01:59,380 --> 00:02:01,208 So, they've got two, 55 00:02:01,208 --> 00:02:05,560 two liter pop bottles on their stomach full of blood. 56 00:02:05,560 --> 00:02:07,562 And then how do they fly away 57 00:02:07,562 --> 00:02:10,478 once they weigh fucking 47 pounds? 58 00:02:10,478 --> 00:02:12,915 I don't know the science behind it all. 59 00:02:12,915 --> 00:02:14,046 You don't know any science. 60 00:02:14,046 --> 00:02:15,613 It's not real man. 61 00:02:15,613 --> 00:02:17,398 Second deadliest animal is a snake. 62 00:02:17,398 --> 00:02:19,704 100,000 people a year. That's a lot. 63 00:02:19,704 --> 00:02:20,879 - That is a lot. 64 00:02:20,879 --> 00:02:23,099 Yeah. Dogs is number three. 65 00:02:23,099 --> 00:02:24,535 - Dogs! - Dogs. 66 00:02:24,535 --> 00:02:26,407 35,000 motherfuckers killed by dogs. 67 00:02:26,407 --> 00:02:28,496 I've been telling you those are dirty bastards. 68 00:02:28,496 --> 00:02:29,497 They're not as- 69 00:02:29,497 --> 00:02:30,976 - It must be kids. 70 00:02:30,976 --> 00:02:32,500 Is it mostly the kids is it you think? 71 00:02:32,500 --> 00:02:33,675 They're not as smart as kitties. 72 00:02:33,675 --> 00:02:34,502 Man I don't fucking know. 73 00:02:34,502 --> 00:02:36,068 I know that. 74 00:02:36,068 --> 00:02:37,940 Kitties are probably the higher number, 75 00:02:37,940 --> 00:02:39,115 but they're smarter and they know how to get away with it. 76 00:02:39,115 --> 00:02:40,247 Here's a really weird one. 77 00:02:40,247 --> 00:02:41,813 Number four, freshwater snails. 78 00:02:41,813 --> 00:02:43,859 - Bull-fucking-shit. - Yeah. 79 00:02:43,859 --> 00:02:45,600 How do they kill people? 80 00:02:45,600 --> 00:02:48,994 They release some fucking parasite. Fucks ya. 81 00:02:48,994 --> 00:02:50,909 Parasitic worms in the water. 82 00:02:50,909 --> 00:02:53,521 They get inside your body and just start fucking ya. 83 00:02:53,521 --> 00:02:55,000 Not like you "fucking ya" fucking ya. 84 00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:56,176 Fucking yourselves? 85 00:02:56,176 --> 00:02:57,742 Fucking over your organs. 86 00:02:57,742 --> 00:02:58,917 I never heard of snails doing that. 87 00:02:58,917 --> 00:03:00,658 Maybe fucking yourselves. 88 00:03:00,658 --> 00:03:02,356 - Number five. Is this, I can't. 89 00:03:02,356 --> 00:03:03,574 How do you say this thing? 90 00:03:03,574 --> 00:03:05,185 It's a t-setzy fly? 91 00:03:07,012 --> 00:03:08,492 - Oh, a tsetse fly. - Tsetse fly. 92 00:03:08,492 --> 00:03:10,277 Tsetse fly. Ya, they fuck you over too. 93 00:03:10,277 --> 00:03:12,017 - 10,000 people a year. 94 00:03:12,017 --> 00:03:13,584 - Yeah, those are dirty- 95 00:03:13,584 --> 00:03:15,369 - They inject some fucking parasites. 96 00:03:15,369 --> 00:03:16,892 It's called sleeping sickness. And it fucking kills ya. 97 00:03:16,892 --> 00:03:18,546 - Those are dirty bastards too. 98 00:03:18,546 --> 00:03:20,156 Scorpion, 33,250. 99 00:03:21,853 --> 00:03:24,378 I thought scorpions weren't that big of a deal. 100 00:03:24,378 --> 00:03:27,511 - Oh no. 3000 people? - It's not a huge deal. 101 00:03:27,511 --> 00:03:29,034 It's a lot of people. 102 00:03:29,034 --> 00:03:30,819 But at the third of the fucking deaths 103 00:03:30,819 --> 00:03:32,299 are in Mexico. So, be careful if you go to Mexico. 104 00:03:32,299 --> 00:03:35,389 You wanna watch out for the "death stalker". 105 00:03:35,389 --> 00:03:36,955 It's quite a name for a scorpion. 106 00:03:36,955 --> 00:03:38,479 Well yeah. 107 00:03:38,479 --> 00:03:39,567 Wouldn't it be easy to kill 'em though? 108 00:03:39,567 --> 00:03:41,046 You just step on them? 109 00:03:41,046 --> 00:03:43,266 Oh, they're pretty agile. 110 00:03:43,266 --> 00:03:45,312 They don't go like, they're not like fast, are they? 111 00:03:45,312 --> 00:03:46,487 He might geek ya out and 112 00:03:46,487 --> 00:03:48,010 get you on the side of the foot. 113 00:03:48,010 --> 00:03:49,185 Like the same thing with a tarantula. 114 00:03:49,185 --> 00:03:50,665 Just go up and step on 'em. 115 00:03:50,665 --> 00:03:52,362 - What if you're asleep? 116 00:03:52,362 --> 00:03:54,843 Well yeah, I think you whack 'em when 117 00:03:54,843 --> 00:03:56,366 you're just getting into bed. 118 00:03:56,366 --> 00:03:58,890 Crocodiles kill 1,000 people a year. 119 00:03:58,890 --> 00:04:01,719 This is a weird one, tape worms. 120 00:04:01,719 --> 00:04:03,982 700 people a year. 121 00:04:03,982 --> 00:04:06,202 Oh, you wanna see a crazy fucking video? 122 00:04:06,202 --> 00:04:07,334 No. 123 00:04:07,334 --> 00:04:08,639 I forgot to show you guys. 124 00:04:08,639 --> 00:04:10,293 Get your machine out. 125 00:04:10,293 --> 00:04:12,164 ThIS moment where the tape worm 126 00:04:12,164 --> 00:04:12,991 comes with the guy's mouth and he eats something? 127 00:04:12,991 --> 00:04:14,645 Oh, man. 128 00:04:14,645 --> 00:04:15,646 - Ricky that- - I don't wanna see that. 129 00:04:15,646 --> 00:04:17,257 Doesn't happen. 130 00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:20,172 He takes a bite of a sandwich or something. 131 00:04:20,172 --> 00:04:23,350 That doesn't happen, Ricky. 132 00:04:23,350 --> 00:04:24,873 I knew a guy, Danny Thomas, 133 00:04:24,873 --> 00:04:26,614 and he told me that he saw it happen 134 00:04:26,614 --> 00:04:28,268 one time in his classroom. 135 00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:30,182 He saw what? 136 00:04:30,182 --> 00:04:31,923 He said that someone had a tape worm in his classroom, 137 00:04:31,923 --> 00:04:33,142 and he saw it come out of a guy's mouth 138 00:04:33,142 --> 00:04:35,405 and take a bite of his sandwich. 139 00:04:35,405 --> 00:04:36,885 He's full of shit, man. 140 00:04:36,885 --> 00:04:39,409 - He's probably. - Where is he from now? 141 00:04:39,409 --> 00:04:41,585 Has he got brain problems? 142 00:04:42,673 --> 00:04:45,197 I think he's from England. 143 00:04:45,197 --> 00:04:46,460 - Okay. - Played in a band. 144 00:04:46,460 --> 00:04:48,200 Seems like a smart guy. 145 00:04:48,200 --> 00:04:49,332 The pirate? 146 00:04:49,332 --> 00:04:51,639 Yeah. That's his nickname. 147 00:04:53,075 --> 00:04:55,686 - Pretty simple. - Simple fuckin' song. 148 00:04:55,686 --> 00:04:58,733 It's only got like, really three chords. 149 00:04:58,733 --> 00:05:01,910 So, what you're gonna need is this one. 150 00:05:04,304 --> 00:05:06,088 If you're gonna do it in the right key, 151 00:05:06,088 --> 00:05:09,352 I mean like, to play along with the tape. 152 00:05:09,352 --> 00:05:10,962 Then you're gonna have to do her here. 153 00:05:10,962 --> 00:05:13,269 If you had a capo, you could put it on there. 154 00:05:13,269 --> 00:05:14,792 And then you could just play a A chord. 155 00:05:14,792 --> 00:05:16,794 But I don't have a capo. 156 00:05:18,274 --> 00:05:20,363 I can't afford one of the fuckin' things. 157 00:05:20,363 --> 00:05:23,627 So I'm gonna play it the the hardcore way. 158 00:05:23,627 --> 00:05:28,415 So if you just make this, which is a B flat barre cord, 159 00:05:30,417 --> 00:05:33,071 You're gonna need that cocksucker right there. 160 00:05:33,071 --> 00:05:35,552 And then if you listen to the, listen close, 161 00:05:35,552 --> 00:05:39,426 he actually slides 'er up. He plays her up here. 162 00:05:39,426 --> 00:05:41,863 Which is a, what would that be now? 163 00:05:41,863 --> 00:05:44,431 That'd be an E flat barre cord. 164 00:05:45,388 --> 00:05:46,737 Exact same cord. 165 00:05:48,478 --> 00:05:50,045 You're just sliding her up there. 166 00:05:51,829 --> 00:05:54,397 Right? So this is at the first fret. 167 00:05:54,397 --> 00:05:57,618 And I guess that would be, where would that go to? 168 00:05:57,618 --> 00:06:00,534 That would be the sixth fret there. 169 00:06:01,970 --> 00:06:03,101 And then you're gonna need this one, 170 00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:07,802 Which is like a F seven cord. 171 00:06:09,543 --> 00:06:10,544 Like that. 172 00:06:13,851 --> 00:06:16,724 That's all the cords you need until there's a key change. 173 00:06:16,724 --> 00:06:18,987 But I'll get to that later. 174 00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:23,687 So the song starts with like a little bass, 175 00:06:23,687 --> 00:06:25,341 little fancy bass thing. 176 00:06:25,341 --> 00:06:28,039 So, if you have a bass you can play it. 177 00:06:28,039 --> 00:06:31,042 But I'll show you basically what it is on the guitar. 178 00:06:31,042 --> 00:06:32,914 It just goes. 179 00:06:32,914 --> 00:06:35,873 So, you're on the first fret here on the D string. 180 00:06:48,625 --> 00:06:50,192 Then it comes in. 181 00:06:50,192 --> 00:06:51,846 So it's just like if you watch close, 182 00:06:51,846 --> 00:06:55,110 it's just like the first fret. It's like. 183 00:07:01,682 --> 00:07:04,728 I don't know really how to explain it, but it's just. 184 00:07:16,044 --> 00:07:17,959 So, you can probably follow along with that. 185 00:07:17,959 --> 00:07:20,831 It's something like that. I mean you can, you know, 186 00:07:20,831 --> 00:07:23,530 put your own little twister onto 'er there. 187 00:07:23,530 --> 00:07:25,096 But it's basically like that. 188 00:07:34,889 --> 00:07:36,456 ♪ Trailers... 189 00:07:36,456 --> 00:07:38,588 So, then it comes in there. So it's. 190 00:07:38,588 --> 00:07:42,766 ♪ Trailers for sale or rent. 191 00:07:42,766 --> 00:07:46,944 ♪ Rooms to let, 50 cents. 192 00:07:46,944 --> 00:07:50,078 ♪ No phone. No pool or pets. 193 00:07:50,078 --> 00:07:52,907 Ah, fuck! I fucked 'er up already! 194 00:07:54,604 --> 00:07:58,739 ♪ No phone. No pool... 195 00:07:58,739 --> 00:08:01,045 Geez! I'm not getting her, 196 00:08:01,045 --> 00:08:02,438 not getting her high enough. 197 00:08:07,965 --> 00:08:11,578 ♪ Trailers for sale or rent. 198 00:08:11,578 --> 00:08:15,712 ♪ Rooms to let, 50 cents. 199 00:08:15,712 --> 00:08:19,107 ♪ No phone. No pools or pets. 200 00:08:37,168 --> 00:08:40,476 ♪ King of the road. 201 00:08:40,476 --> 00:08:42,217 That's basically how she goes. 202 00:08:42,217 --> 00:08:45,046 I know you mean, you can sing. 203 00:08:45,046 --> 00:08:47,091 ♪ King of the road. 204 00:08:47,091 --> 00:08:49,441 Or you can get all fancy cause there's a harmony guy 205 00:08:49,441 --> 00:08:51,008 in there that goes: 206 00:08:57,885 --> 00:08:59,843 So you can either sing. 207 00:09:04,892 --> 00:09:06,458 Or the harmony guy goes: 208 00:09:06,458 --> 00:09:07,982 ♪ King, king, king, 209 00:09:07,982 --> 00:09:12,421 King of the road. King of the road. ♪ 210 00:09:13,509 --> 00:09:15,772 That's how you do the harmony. 211 00:09:15,772 --> 00:09:19,559 ♪ King of the road. 212 00:09:20,734 --> 00:09:23,954 ♪ Trailers for sale or rent. 213 00:09:23,954 --> 00:09:28,045 ♪ Rooms to let, 50 cent. 214 00:09:28,045 --> 00:09:31,179 ♪ No pool. No phones. No pets. 215 00:09:48,413 --> 00:09:51,591 ♪ King of the road. 216 00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:53,505 And it'd be great if you could have some 217 00:09:53,505 --> 00:09:56,117 arsehole standing next to you doing this. 218 00:09:56,117 --> 00:09:58,075 It would make a big difference cause that 219 00:09:58,075 --> 00:10:00,164 goes right through the goddamn song. 220 00:10:00,164 --> 00:10:02,558 It'll make it sound a lot more real. 221 00:10:02,558 --> 00:10:06,606 And then all that happens. That's how you do the whole song. 222 00:10:06,606 --> 00:10:09,434 But then eventually he gets into that song, 223 00:10:09,434 --> 00:10:11,436 the verse about engineers and 224 00:10:11,436 --> 00:10:13,830 knowing his kids and that shit. 225 00:10:13,830 --> 00:10:16,703 You just slide 'er up all one fret. 226 00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:24,014 So you're just going B. That's a B chord. 227 00:10:25,712 --> 00:10:28,802 Then you're going up to the E, there. 228 00:10:30,630 --> 00:10:34,590 And then you're doing this. F sharp 7 instead of F 7. 229 00:10:36,461 --> 00:10:37,985 But if you're listening on the tape, 230 00:10:37,985 --> 00:10:40,727 he gets into this like, double time bullshit. 231 00:10:40,727 --> 00:10:43,512 So, if you want to play it accurately, you gotta do it. 232 00:10:43,512 --> 00:10:44,861 Like he does like a: 233 00:10:59,354 --> 00:11:03,532 He does it like that. It's kinda bullshit if ya ask me. 234 00:11:03,532 --> 00:11:06,535 But again, you know, he might have been jacked up on glue. 235 00:11:06,535 --> 00:11:07,928 That's what makes you get all like, 236 00:11:12,410 --> 00:11:15,500 And he actually plays 'er up high here if you listen to it. 237 00:11:15,500 --> 00:11:17,894 So it's this F cord up here. 238 00:11:17,894 --> 00:11:21,376 And instead of this, you leave this guy here blank. 239 00:11:21,376 --> 00:11:23,291 So you do it like that. 240 00:11:32,822 --> 00:11:35,477 Same bullshit though. That's how you do it. 241 00:11:35,477 --> 00:11:38,698 That's "King of the Road." Roger Miller. 242 00:11:38,698 --> 00:11:40,438 Listen, I'm really glad that you accepted 243 00:11:40,438 --> 00:11:43,615 my invitation to go out to lunch. This is great. 244 00:11:43,615 --> 00:11:45,182 - Yeah. 245 00:11:45,182 --> 00:11:46,009 Yeah, I got some really big news to 246 00:11:46,009 --> 00:11:47,228 share with you. 247 00:11:47,228 --> 00:11:48,751 - Really? - Yeah. 248 00:11:48,751 --> 00:11:50,318 Our stars must be aligned, Randy 249 00:11:50,318 --> 00:11:51,841 I got some news for you too, big guy. 250 00:11:51,841 --> 00:11:53,408 - Are you serious? - Yeah. 251 00:11:53,408 --> 00:11:55,062 I'm gonna take you to my favorite place. 252 00:11:55,062 --> 00:11:57,064 - It's just up the road here. - What's that? 253 00:11:57,064 --> 00:11:58,718 Yeah, it's called The King. 254 00:11:58,718 --> 00:12:01,459 Really? Is that European cuisine? 255 00:12:01,459 --> 00:12:04,288 No, no, no. It's North American, Dawn. 256 00:12:04,288 --> 00:12:06,638 It's great North American food. 257 00:12:06,638 --> 00:12:08,728 Yeah, it's awesome. You're gonna love it. 258 00:12:08,728 --> 00:12:10,555 And it's a good deal too. 259 00:12:10,555 --> 00:12:13,776 - Okay. I wonder what they have for a plant inspired menu. 260 00:12:13,776 --> 00:12:15,343 Well, I think they got like tomatoes 261 00:12:15,343 --> 00:12:16,910 and stuff like that. 262 00:12:16,910 --> 00:12:19,260 So that should help you out pretty much though. 263 00:12:19,260 --> 00:12:20,261 Here we are. 264 00:12:21,349 --> 00:12:22,829 I was thinking maybe sushi, 265 00:12:22,829 --> 00:12:24,700 but this should be pretty good. 266 00:12:24,700 --> 00:12:29,139 - Oh, I'm so hungry. - This is gonna be awesome. 267 00:12:29,139 --> 00:12:30,967 Can I take your order? 268 00:12:30,967 --> 00:12:35,363 - Yes, I'd like to order three cheeseburgers. 269 00:12:35,363 --> 00:12:36,364 Okay. 270 00:12:36,364 --> 00:12:38,583 With just ketchup. 271 00:12:38,583 --> 00:12:40,411 All right. 272 00:12:40,411 --> 00:12:44,546 And could I get three cheeseburgers, just regular. 273 00:12:47,854 --> 00:12:49,116 Ketchup, mustard, pickles? 274 00:12:49,116 --> 00:12:51,205 Yes, please. 275 00:12:51,205 --> 00:12:55,513 And could I get three cheeseburgers with extra pickles? 276 00:12:57,777 --> 00:12:59,300 Okay. 277 00:12:59,300 --> 00:13:01,911 That's a total of nine cheeseburgers? 278 00:13:01,911 --> 00:13:04,566 Yeah, no, we better get three more cheeseburgers. 279 00:13:04,566 --> 00:13:07,047 And I'm just gonna get those ones plain, please. 280 00:13:07,047 --> 00:13:08,526 - Okay. - Anything else for you today? 281 00:13:08,526 --> 00:13:10,050 Drinks or anything? 282 00:13:10,050 --> 00:13:12,922 Yes, I'm gonna get two large onion rings. 283 00:13:14,271 --> 00:13:16,143 Okay. 284 00:13:16,143 --> 00:13:18,493 Can I get two of your value chicken sandwiches. 285 00:13:18,493 --> 00:13:21,365 No. Make it four of those, Bud. 286 00:13:21,365 --> 00:13:22,410 Four chicken juniors? 287 00:13:22,410 --> 00:13:24,281 Yes, please. 288 00:13:24,281 --> 00:13:25,456 - Okay. - Anything else for you today? 289 00:13:25,456 --> 00:13:28,372 - Yeah, I need a large diet pop. 290 00:13:28,372 --> 00:13:30,810 - Okay. - Large, how many of those? 291 00:13:30,810 --> 00:13:32,942 Just one large diet pop. 292 00:13:34,726 --> 00:13:37,120 And, and oh, sorry, my friend Dawn 293 00:13:37,120 --> 00:13:39,819 wants to order something too. Here, go ahead Dawn. 294 00:13:39,819 --> 00:13:41,603 Going on...? 295 00:13:41,603 --> 00:13:43,213 Yeah, you can put Dawn's on my bill, please. 296 00:13:43,213 --> 00:13:44,127 - Thank you - Okay, 297 00:13:44,127 --> 00:13:45,955 no problem. 298 00:13:45,955 --> 00:13:49,916 Yes, I'll have something off your plant inspired menu. 299 00:13:51,526 --> 00:13:53,354 I'll have garden salad. 300 00:13:53,354 --> 00:13:56,183 - Okay. - Any dressing with your salad? 301 00:13:56,183 --> 00:13:58,011 - Yes. Could I- 302 00:13:58,011 --> 00:14:00,187 - I have Balsamic, lite Italian, 303 00:14:00,187 --> 00:14:02,276 lite ranch and Caesar. 304 00:14:02,276 --> 00:14:03,755 - The balsamic, please. 305 00:14:03,755 --> 00:14:04,887 Okay. 306 00:14:04,887 --> 00:14:07,194 That sounds delightful. 307 00:14:07,194 --> 00:14:10,458 And I'll have a orange juice. 308 00:14:10,458 --> 00:14:12,416 Okay. Orange juice. 309 00:14:12,416 --> 00:14:13,678 Anything else I can get for you? 310 00:14:13,678 --> 00:14:15,419 - Oh, I forgot. 311 00:14:15,419 --> 00:14:19,206 Could I also get a poutine, a large poutine. 312 00:14:19,206 --> 00:14:20,555 - Okay. - I only have one size. 313 00:14:20,555 --> 00:14:22,383 - Okay. Yeah, one size. 314 00:14:22,383 --> 00:14:23,558 Okay. 315 00:14:23,558 --> 00:14:25,473 And can you make an order of 316 00:14:25,473 --> 00:14:29,216 onion rings and put the poutine sauce on it? 317 00:14:29,216 --> 00:14:31,348 Like an onion ring poutine? 318 00:14:31,348 --> 00:14:32,523 I can probably do that- 319 00:14:32,523 --> 00:14:33,916 - That would be great. Okay. 320 00:14:33,916 --> 00:14:35,787 How much is that gonna be, bud? 321 00:14:35,787 --> 00:14:37,441 It'll be. $59.28 altogether. 322 00:14:37,441 --> 00:14:38,878 Awesome. 323 00:14:38,878 --> 00:14:41,445 One of those- 324 00:14:41,445 --> 00:14:43,883 - Wow. That's quite the order you got there. 325 00:14:43,883 --> 00:14:46,102 Oh, this is gonna be just so good. 326 00:14:46,102 --> 00:14:47,582 Prunes or gherkins. 327 00:14:47,582 --> 00:14:48,757 Prunes. 328 00:14:48,757 --> 00:14:50,454 Right on boys, clear broths, 329 00:14:50,454 --> 00:14:53,457 hot pepper steak, some stew-y shit. 330 00:14:53,457 --> 00:14:55,546 Dessert is baked 'runies. 331 00:14:57,374 --> 00:14:58,898 Fuck, Squirrel. I didn't know you could cook, man. 332 00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:01,770 This is awesome. I'm fuckin' starving. 333 00:15:01,770 --> 00:15:03,641 Must be good. 334 00:15:03,641 --> 00:15:05,469 Looks like you're running out of a bunch of shit. 335 00:15:05,469 --> 00:15:08,820 I'll take some of everything, dude. 336 00:15:08,820 --> 00:15:10,822 Salad and broth. 337 00:15:10,822 --> 00:15:13,086 Salad? It's not a fucking salad. 338 00:15:13,086 --> 00:15:16,219 It's a piece of shitty lettuce. 339 00:15:16,219 --> 00:15:18,091 Well, what the fuck is this? 340 00:15:18,091 --> 00:15:19,266 I thought that was just a tray with something sad in. 341 00:15:19,266 --> 00:15:21,529 This one's chicken broth. 342 00:15:21,529 --> 00:15:24,184 - Chicken broth? - It looks like piss. 343 00:15:24,184 --> 00:15:25,750 Is this a fuckin' joke, man? 344 00:15:25,750 --> 00:15:28,057 Bun or cracker? 345 00:15:29,798 --> 00:15:32,192 Bun, I guess. You're fuckin' for real right now? 346 00:15:32,192 --> 00:15:33,367 This is lunch? 347 00:15:35,108 --> 00:15:38,720 Give me another one, that one fuckin' fell. 348 00:15:40,504 --> 00:15:43,116 Man, when you need hash, I'm the go through guy, okay? 349 00:15:43,116 --> 00:15:45,857 I can give you hash, but I can't eat this shit. 350 00:15:45,857 --> 00:15:47,642 I need fuckin' like the other guys made. 351 00:15:47,642 --> 00:15:51,124 Pizza, fish, fuckin' burgers, hotdog, sausages, pork, 352 00:15:51,124 --> 00:15:53,778 smoked fuckin' meat, lobster. 353 00:15:53,778 --> 00:15:56,259 This is fuckin' bullshit, man. 354 00:15:56,259 --> 00:15:57,826 Listen, Squirrel. 355 00:15:57,826 --> 00:15:59,306 You gotta have something else back there, man. 356 00:15:59,306 --> 00:16:00,481 I'll give you a nice piece of hash. 357 00:16:00,481 --> 00:16:02,222 I need something different. 358 00:16:02,222 --> 00:16:03,832 Tell me you got something else from me, man. 359 00:16:03,832 --> 00:16:04,833 Ricky, I got something for you. 360 00:16:04,833 --> 00:16:05,921 Thank fuck. 361 00:16:10,665 --> 00:16:13,015 This is fuckin' bullshit. 362 00:16:13,015 --> 00:16:16,149 This? This doesn't live off this. 363 00:16:16,149 --> 00:16:17,715 You gotta fuckin' fix this shit. 364 00:16:17,715 --> 00:16:20,196 Ricky, settle the fuck down. 365 00:16:22,242 --> 00:16:24,331 Salad or chicken broth? 366 00:16:25,680 --> 00:16:27,595 Salad, please. 367 00:16:27,595 --> 00:16:29,727 Aw, I got the stump! 368 00:16:29,727 --> 00:16:31,033 I got the stump. 369 00:16:33,166 --> 00:16:35,777 - All right, we made it in, look at this place. 370 00:16:35,777 --> 00:16:37,257 This is fantastic. 371 00:16:38,998 --> 00:16:40,390 I can't think of a better place to be right now at 372 00:16:40,390 --> 00:16:41,957 this level of buzz on, 373 00:16:41,957 --> 00:16:43,828 getting stoned and going to the aquium. 374 00:16:43,828 --> 00:16:45,613 It's wicked. 375 00:16:45,613 --> 00:16:49,312 Ricky, it's the Ripley's Aquarium of Canada. 376 00:16:49,312 --> 00:16:50,313 That's what it's called. 377 00:16:50,313 --> 00:16:51,880 - Aquium, Ricky. 378 00:16:51,880 --> 00:16:54,622 Aquarium. Repeat, say it. Aquarium. 379 00:16:54,622 --> 00:16:55,449 Aquari. 380 00:16:56,624 --> 00:16:57,886 Um. 381 00:16:57,886 --> 00:16:59,366 - Aquarium. - Aquarium. 382 00:16:59,366 --> 00:17:00,715 Almost Overnight, 383 00:17:00,715 --> 00:17:02,195 Canada's abundant fish... 384 00:17:02,195 --> 00:17:04,023 Oh fuck! Look at the size of that guy. 385 00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:05,633 ...tons upon tons of fish 386 00:17:05,633 --> 00:17:07,200 back to the old world. 387 00:17:07,200 --> 00:17:09,028 Boys, where's that voice coming from? 388 00:17:09,028 --> 00:17:10,203 Canada's fishing industry 389 00:17:10,203 --> 00:17:11,726 is worth $5 billion a year. 390 00:17:11,726 --> 00:17:12,901 Is that the fish talking? 391 00:17:12,901 --> 00:17:14,685 It's not the fish. 392 00:17:14,685 --> 00:17:17,123 It Provides jobs to 130,000 people. 393 00:17:17,123 --> 00:17:20,039 In more than 1500 communities. 394 00:17:20,039 --> 00:17:21,562 If we could get him outta here, 395 00:17:21,562 --> 00:17:23,694 we could eat him for about two years. 396 00:17:23,694 --> 00:17:24,608 At least. 397 00:17:29,744 --> 00:17:32,355 - I wonder, could we get him outta here, Julian. 398 00:17:32,355 --> 00:17:34,488 There's no way we're gonna get a 880 pounder out of here. 399 00:17:34,488 --> 00:17:36,055 - Bubbles, you get me in a tank. 400 00:17:36,055 --> 00:17:37,621 I'll pet my shark and, I'll get you whatever 401 00:17:37,621 --> 00:17:40,668 you want for supper. Anything you want. 402 00:17:40,668 --> 00:17:41,930 How's it going? 403 00:17:43,714 --> 00:17:45,238 Hey boys, you know what? This stuff's kind of cool. 404 00:17:45,238 --> 00:17:46,500 I like all the fish and stuff being baked, 405 00:17:46,500 --> 00:17:48,545 but I want go find the sharks. 406 00:17:48,545 --> 00:17:51,766 I want to pet a shark. Possibly fight a shark. 407 00:17:51,766 --> 00:17:54,334 - Look Ricky, look. - Dangerous Lagoon. 408 00:17:54,334 --> 00:17:56,075 This is it, isn't it? 409 00:17:56,075 --> 00:17:58,077 That's probably what we're looking for. 410 00:17:58,077 --> 00:17:59,513 Alright. I'm ready. 411 00:17:59,513 --> 00:18:02,385 I'm gonna start getting warmed up here. 412 00:18:03,865 --> 00:18:05,997 Ricky, look at 'em. 413 00:18:05,997 --> 00:18:07,782 Where's he going? 414 00:18:07,782 --> 00:18:10,045 Keep running away. 415 00:18:10,045 --> 00:18:10,872 Let's go. 416 00:18:11,873 --> 00:18:13,092 Down here, bud. 417 00:18:14,571 --> 00:18:16,443 Come on. Get back here, you pussy. 418 00:18:16,443 --> 00:18:18,053 There's no way that shark 419 00:18:18,053 --> 00:18:19,185 can hear you. He's not backin' down. 420 00:18:19,185 --> 00:18:21,491 And they don't know English. 421 00:18:21,491 --> 00:18:24,625 So I'm not gonna get to pet or fight a shark today. 422 00:18:24,625 --> 00:18:26,931 What's the point of even being here? 423 00:18:26,931 --> 00:18:29,891 Well, you're just supposed to enjoy the nice scenery, 424 00:18:29,891 --> 00:18:30,718 Ricky. 425 00:18:32,459 --> 00:18:36,245 Can't we get up top to where they are or something? 426 00:18:36,245 --> 00:18:39,596 - No, we can't get in the tanks. 427 00:18:39,596 --> 00:18:42,164 We're not allowed in the tanks. 428 00:18:44,035 --> 00:18:45,820 Yeah, Ricky go through the tube and try to fight one. 429 00:18:45,820 --> 00:18:46,777 All right. 430 00:18:52,348 --> 00:18:55,743 He's gonna look like a total idiot. 431 00:18:55,743 --> 00:18:57,397 Look how dumb he is. 432 00:19:00,704 --> 00:19:02,967 Get him, Ricky! 433 00:19:07,929 --> 00:19:09,322 What did they say? 434 00:19:09,322 --> 00:19:10,323 They're just swimming away from me. 435 00:19:10,323 --> 00:19:11,585 Bunch of pussies. 436 00:19:15,980 --> 00:19:17,852 Ricky, oh shit, he's moving. 437 00:19:17,852 --> 00:19:18,679 - Nice. 438 00:19:21,116 --> 00:19:22,900 About as close as we're gonna get to one, I guess. 439 00:19:22,900 --> 00:19:25,164 Do you still think you could beat that thing, Ricky? 440 00:19:25,164 --> 00:19:27,078 I wouldn't want to take that one on. That's big. 441 00:19:27,078 --> 00:19:28,732 Look at those teeth. 442 00:19:30,821 --> 00:19:32,867 I wouldn't want you trying to fight thing. 443 00:19:32,867 --> 00:19:35,435 No, I wanna fight a little guy. 444 00:19:35,435 --> 00:19:38,612 - You mean one like the same height as you? 445 00:19:38,612 --> 00:19:42,529 Yeah, my height or maybe a little bit bigger. 446 00:19:44,705 --> 00:19:46,141 - Okay Ricky, here's some sharks 447 00:19:46,141 --> 00:19:47,969 that you can actually touch. 448 00:19:47,969 --> 00:19:50,406 I don't want touch or fight any this small though. 449 00:19:50,406 --> 00:19:52,234 - What? 450 00:19:52,234 --> 00:19:53,235 I just don't wanna touch or fight anything this small. 451 00:19:53,235 --> 00:19:54,410 They're too small. 452 00:19:54,410 --> 00:19:55,411 - At least touch it and pat it. 453 00:19:55,411 --> 00:19:56,586 Alright. 454 00:19:56,586 --> 00:19:58,414 Just pet it, Ricky. 455 00:19:58,414 --> 00:19:59,981 They likely won't even move at all. 456 00:19:59,981 --> 00:20:01,156 If you just kinda pet them along the back, 457 00:20:01,156 --> 00:20:02,592 like you'd touch a dog or a cat. 458 00:20:02,592 --> 00:20:03,767 They likely will just stay right there 459 00:20:03,767 --> 00:20:05,552 and be really, really good. 460 00:20:05,552 --> 00:20:07,075 You heard the man, Ricky. You heard the man. 461 00:20:07,075 --> 00:20:08,555 - I'm just waiting. - You wanted to- 462 00:20:08,555 --> 00:20:10,034 - Just waiting for some people to do it. 463 00:20:10,034 --> 00:20:11,210 Just don't stick 464 00:20:11,210 --> 00:20:11,993 your finger in its mouth. 465 00:20:11,993 --> 00:20:12,820 - Okay. 466 00:20:14,343 --> 00:20:15,866 - Rick, it's just a little tiny shark, bud. 467 00:20:15,866 --> 00:20:17,346 Why, what? Are you afraid? 468 00:20:17,346 --> 00:20:18,869 Why don't you touch it first, Julian? 469 00:20:18,869 --> 00:20:20,393 No, no. You're the one that wanted 470 00:20:20,393 --> 00:20:21,872 to come in here and fight a shark. 471 00:20:21,872 --> 00:20:23,439 Yeah, but not something this small. 472 00:20:23,439 --> 00:20:25,049 No. Well, why don't you at least touch it? 473 00:20:25,049 --> 00:20:28,314 Ricky, look. There's one right there. 474 00:20:28,314 --> 00:20:31,491 All right, I'm gonna try to pet 'em. 475 00:20:31,491 --> 00:20:34,320 That's why we should talk- 476 00:20:34,320 --> 00:20:36,322 - Maybe you guys should try it first. 477 00:20:36,322 --> 00:20:37,497 - What? - Are you scared? 478 00:20:37,497 --> 00:20:38,976 Are you a 'fraidy cat, Ricky? 479 00:20:38,976 --> 00:20:40,848 No. I'm not afraid a 'fraidy cat. 480 00:20:40,848 --> 00:20:43,198 It's just, the small ones are the most dangerous ones. 481 00:20:43,198 --> 00:20:44,982 He said these are like basically 482 00:20:44,982 --> 00:20:46,506 like cats and dogs of the sea. 483 00:20:46,506 --> 00:20:47,942 You can pet them. 484 00:20:49,248 --> 00:20:51,250 - All right, here we go. 485 00:20:53,208 --> 00:20:54,688 It feels like... 486 00:20:56,037 --> 00:20:57,691 It feels like a piece of rubber. 487 00:20:57,691 --> 00:20:59,562 Like a rubber boot. 488 00:20:59,562 --> 00:21:02,173 It's this one right at the top. Holy fuck. 489 00:21:02,173 --> 00:21:03,305 What is this, man? 490 00:21:03,305 --> 00:21:05,394 Watch this video. Oh baby. 491 00:21:07,178 --> 00:21:10,660 Show it to Ricky. You're not gonna like this, Ricky. 492 00:21:10,660 --> 00:21:13,446 No, he's just hanging out, right? 493 00:21:13,446 --> 00:21:15,186 - What is this? A snake? 494 00:21:15,186 --> 00:21:16,710 He's just hanging out in a- 495 00:21:16,710 --> 00:21:18,189 - Oh, fuck. See, I don't like the way. 496 00:21:18,189 --> 00:21:20,104 In doctor's office and- 497 00:21:20,104 --> 00:21:21,628 - Talking to somebody. 498 00:21:21,628 --> 00:21:23,978 - Talking. And then he noticed the cocksucker. 499 00:21:27,329 --> 00:21:30,289 Oh, look out. Look out. 500 00:21:34,293 --> 00:21:36,207 Look at that cocksucker. 501 00:21:36,207 --> 00:21:38,079 Stompin' the shit out of him. Did he get him? 502 00:21:38,079 --> 00:21:40,473 He gets 'em. But Jesus, he knows how to do it. 503 00:21:40,473 --> 00:21:43,911 Look, he gets him the right way but, 504 00:21:43,911 --> 00:21:46,043 he's just sitting there enjoying his day and 505 00:21:46,043 --> 00:21:49,003 that cocksucker comes in and starts. 506 00:21:49,003 --> 00:21:51,005 - Fuck, Buddy doesn't fuck around with the snakes, does he? 507 00:21:51,005 --> 00:21:52,311 - No, he got 'em. - That's good, man. 508 00:21:52,311 --> 00:21:54,095 I would've died, for sure. 509 00:21:54,095 --> 00:21:56,271 All right. Good going, dude. 510 00:21:56,271 --> 00:21:58,273 God, I, oh boy. 511 00:21:58,273 --> 00:22:02,059 I wanna know where that is cause I'm not going there. 512 00:22:02,059 --> 00:22:03,539 That thing just came in, 513 00:22:03,539 --> 00:22:06,368 it must have had rabies or something. 514 00:22:06,368 --> 00:22:08,283 Can snakes get rabies? 515 00:22:08,283 --> 00:22:09,589 There's a cop there. He's like, "Oh, get the fuckin' 516 00:22:09,589 --> 00:22:10,851 thing outta here, bud." 517 00:22:10,851 --> 00:22:12,026 I know they can get the flu. 518 00:22:12,026 --> 00:22:13,375 I don't know about rabies. 519 00:22:13,375 --> 00:22:14,550 Who can get the flu? 520 00:22:14,550 --> 00:22:16,639 Snakes. They can sneeze. 521 00:22:18,337 --> 00:22:21,165 Is that fuckin' true? 522 00:22:21,165 --> 00:22:22,863 Ricky, how do you know this? 523 00:22:22,863 --> 00:22:24,299 - I've seen it. 524 00:22:24,299 --> 00:22:25,909 You've seen snakes- 525 00:22:25,909 --> 00:22:27,911 - Little garter snake. - Sneezing. 526 00:22:27,911 --> 00:22:30,392 Yeah. Had a sneezing fit. 527 00:22:30,392 --> 00:22:31,959 - I don't believe that. - No, 528 00:22:31,959 --> 00:22:33,874 it could have been a cat actually. 529 00:22:33,874 --> 00:22:35,266 There was a snake and a cat and one of 'em was sneezing. 530 00:22:35,266 --> 00:22:36,398 Does a cat sneeze? 531 00:22:36,398 --> 00:22:38,792 Yes. Snakes don't sneeze. 532 00:22:38,792 --> 00:22:42,273 - How fucked up were you, fuckin, like Rick. 533 00:22:42,273 --> 00:22:44,885 - Punch in "Can snakes sneeze?" 534 00:22:44,885 --> 00:22:46,452 I need to know now. 535 00:22:49,498 --> 00:22:51,021 I hope they can. 536 00:22:51,021 --> 00:22:53,981 I'll feel like I'm smarter than you guys. 537 00:22:55,243 --> 00:22:57,985 - No. - Fuck! 538 00:22:57,985 --> 00:22:59,726 They don't have a diaphragm. 539 00:22:59,726 --> 00:23:02,250 - They're not fuckin' sneezing. - What's a diaphragm? 540 00:23:02,250 --> 00:23:04,078 Jesus, Rick. 541 00:23:04,078 --> 00:23:07,560 - I've heard of it for sex. - It's... 542 00:23:07,560 --> 00:23:08,909 never mind, man. 543 00:23:10,432 --> 00:23:11,955 You heard about it for sex? 544 00:23:11,955 --> 00:23:13,304 Doesn't it stop... 545 00:23:13,304 --> 00:23:15,089 - That's a, yes, 546 00:23:15,089 --> 00:23:18,309 there is a diaphragm thing that ladies can use. 547 00:23:46,686 --> 00:23:48,122 Fuck off.